Improve your Relationships

Thought I would elaborate on my previous post with regard to the hot topic of last year which was relationships.
Now this is a small insight into a coaching approach to improve relationships and is not the be all and end all. I realise some situations are very complex and long in the making. If you have tried everything that you want to, it may be time to move on: however this may not be possible if we are talking about colleagues or family. If this person, or persons, are pretty permanent fixtures in your life right now, and for the foreseeable future, the onus is with you if you want change.
Firstly we are all guilty of merely reacting and not considering. Time to take charge of our feelings, our thoughts and words. Taking responsibility is for grown ups so if you want to stay child like or hold on to your victim status read no further.
Change is the word of the day and that means you first. Our environmental situation is affected by our thoughts, words and deeds. The second two you can probably envisage easily enough, how about your thoughts? Can what is going on in your head change what happens around you. Only one way to find out and that is to give it a go.
Consider the person with low self esteem and poor body image that muddles through the day hoping something wonderful will happen in their life. They believe it will never happen, why would it, after all they don't deserve it. Everything he or she says or does will reflect these feelings and those around will absorb this mantra like vibration. This person may miss golden opportunities because their mind is not open to them, and the fearful or negative chatter in their head will constantly steer them in the opposite direction to the very people they need in their life. A change in mind-set is the start to them achieving a full and meaningful life.
Easy for me to say! The question is what to do. What action is needed?
For starters look inside your head (metaphorically) and examine the thoughts that arise on a daily basis. On the way to work are you cursing certain people? Have you decided when the first altercation will arise? Is today the day you get in with the first insult? The universe is well aware of what you want following this pattern of thought and will deliver. Time to stop this particular train in its tracks and re-invent the wheel at the same time.
Re frame your thoughts with positive helpful words about your situation and the people around you. Make these statements future based, almost a thank you for how good thing's are. For example if Dave at work is less than sharing with computer time you may say, 'I love how Dave is always considerate with computer time giving me a heads up when its free'.
The statement is future based as change may not happen over night, its positive and grateful. It may feel odd to utter what you know to be untrue but gives your subconscious mind time to adjust to how things will be, therefore less chance of it blocking your awareness. More about the subconscious another time.
So what's it to be: ~Wish list or action plan?